For anyone who won't be able to sleep tonight without knowing the state of my ovaries...

We missed it. I went to the RE yesterday, ponied up another $100 for a tryst with the dildo-cam, just to find that the pretty follicle I was growing last week had already popped its goods and collapsed. Regardless of your location in the world, you may have felt the aftershocks of my nuclear-blast of my "WHAT??????? COME ON!!!!" reaction when the RE told me.

I was good, though. There was no weeping (in front of the RE), but I did sulk enough to merit an arm around my shoulder and a "Don't worry. We'll get it right soon", to which I responded with a wicked intelligent and eloquent, "I hope so because this really sucks." Seriously, the English teacher in me fades farther and farther from my consciousness every day and I find my brain mushier and more devoid of substance (and vocabulary) daily. I didn't even realize what was going on in Iran until yesterday because Noggin, those sonsofbitches, don't do hourly world news updates in between Yo Gabba Gabba and Little Bear.

Anyway, I digress. Back in the car, Ethan asked if I was okay (yeah, did I mention I had to bring him? To my dildo-cam appointment? I sat him on the chair way behind my head, told him the doctor was going to look at my tummy, and I gave him a lollipop. I hope I didn't traumatize him for life. Do you think?). He is such a sweetheart, and such a lovebug, he could tell I was upset and probably knew that the banana split we found in front of us 15 minutes later, because I said he was such a good boy that he deserved a treat, was more for me than for him.

But what can I do? I had a bum set of ovulation tests. And for those who mentioned them, I was also using the digital ovulation tests, because I am JUST that obsessive---I was peeing on the regular sticks AND using digitals at the same time. I guess I just started using the digitals too late (because I didn't get them until I started to suspect that the regular tests were faulty).

Next month I will be camping out at my RE's office daily from the time of my follicle check until I meet the turkey baster (IUI) again. I don't care if they have to bleed me dry, they are doing blood tests every day to check for ovulation. I'm not going to be injecting fertility meds (especially knowing what's in some of those things---um, ew.) into my belly or my butt every day just to miss another ovulation.

Thank you for all of your kind words and thoughts. It really does mean a lot to Husband and me that friends, family and interweb strangers alike are pulling for us.